Monday, January 07, 2008

Things guys shouldn't tell me on dates

"I don't have a job or a microwave, or a tv, or a couch exactly right now but I really think I'm falling for you...wanna watch a movie on my computer at my house?" (this was on the first date, he met me in the checkout line at Walmart...don't ask).

"I'm texting you till you start texting me back, no exceptions you will go out with me again" (same guy)

"If you really loved me you'd cut off all your hair" (ex boyfriend)

"I've gone to the restaurant you wanted, hung out with your friends and done everything you wanted tonight and still got nothing from you" (some one-date dude)

"That girl in the restaurant dressed like such a slut, she deserves to get raped tonight." (same guy as the first two quotes)

Actually, perhaps those guys should tell me those things so I have a good enough chance to escape. Such is the newly single life, I suppose.

13 comments:

abby said...

It's experiences like this that make you feel grateful when you find someone nice to date.

B. said...

I think you should go out with Wal-Mart guy again, just for the blog material.

Anonymous said...

Thats hard to believe, i really doubt all that happened. It sounds like another false story that you wrote. Here's an example, why did you even waste your time on him if he was making so many misses? It's true there is a lot of dumb guys out there, but just knowing you its a little hard to believe.

Jake said...

It sounds very true! I agree with b. you should do the same as the girl on "How to Lose a guy in ten days" and go out with him again! and keep up on "Things Guys shouldn't tell me on dates" It will probably help out a lot of dead beats. Give us more Blogs!

SJ said...

Sadly it is true. And there are plenty of other girls - and guys - who have had their dates say and do really idiotic stuff, too.

I once had a guy tell me he had a special way of kissing and then proceeded to blow a lot of air into my cheeks. He told me he called it the "puffer fish". I called it totally wierd and gross. But he really, actually did that and really actually thought it would impress me somehow.

It's all part of the charm of being single and dating other interesting singles. But then again, yes Jake and B. at least it does provide a lot of good blog fodder.

$teve said...

At least they show up. There's a lot to be said for that. :) I'm sorry you're dating life sucks. Believe me, I feel your pain. It'll turn around though. Some lucky guy'll find you...and he won't have to go door-to-door everytime he moves. :)

SJ said...

Thanks for the good thoughts Steve. Actually the dating life is good. I'm dating now more than I ever have in my life. Just once in a while they come in "interesting" experiences.

It turns out "anonymous" commentor above is actually Walmart guy. Somehow he found my blog.

Steve said...

Yeah, it seemed pretty obvious he was a jilted guy from his comments. Wonder why he is still single? haha.

Sarah, you know what they say, when you aren't looking, that is when you find love. It's so true it is scary. Wish you the best and look at the bright side, maybe you can get some free dinners and movies out of this situation and have some funny stories for all of us, haha.
And I'm sooooooo glad you didn't cut your hair. I want more blonde pics! haha.

Sherpa said...

Chin up, you'll find someone awesome to date. Meanwhile, that was entertaining. Thanks for that.

B. said...

I'm so disturbed by the puffer fish thing.

mj said...

ha ha ha. this is good stuff. good stories are definitely worth some personal inconvenience and awkwardness. as long as your date isn't scary and threatening to you. anyway going on more dates makes you
a) less awkward when you actually go on good dates
b) have more confidence
c) be able to laugh and not over-analyze so much

all of which are sooo good for you.

Lee said...

I was so close to giving you a puffer on your birthday. Good thing we went to breakfast instead.

Anyway, B, if you want one.....(pm me).

SJ said...

"It seemed like a good idea at the time"