"I don't have a job or a microwave, or a tv, or a couch exactly right now but I really think I'm falling for you...wanna watch a movie on my computer at my house?" (this was on the first date, he met me in the checkout line at Walmart...don't ask).
"I'm texting you till you start texting me back, no exceptions you will go out with me again" (same guy)
"If you really loved me you'd cut off all your hair" (ex boyfriend)
"I've gone to the restaurant you wanted, hung out with your friends and done everything you wanted tonight and still got nothing from you" (some one-date dude)
"That girl in the restaurant dressed like such a slut, she deserves to get raped tonight." (same guy as the first two quotes)
Actually, perhaps those guys should tell me those things so I have a good enough chance to escape. Such is the newly single life, I suppose.