The Break Up

It's the eve of my great migration from Provo to the SLC. The house is in complete disarray. I'm moving out, two other girls are moving in and all our crap is pretty much anywhere we could find the room. I realize every time I move how much I have that I really don't need, stuff that I haven't even used for years. And then I wonder how much of it am I going to throw out and then miss later when I realize I'd tossed it. But there are some things, clothes in particular, that I just can't seem to part with. For instance, my plaid shirt with the small hole in the arm (I swear those things are coming back in style someday). It reminds me of Kurt Cobain, and the 90's, and the days back in junior high when it was somehow entirely acceptable for girls to wear boxer shorts in public like they'd wear pants. We'd wear sweatshirts that said things like "B.U.M. Equipment" with them, or our wrinkled plaid shirts and beanies. Back then slummy was sexy.

I've been cold-hearted about what I've thrown out this move. Even my black leather boots had to go. I finally faced facts after a little heart to heart and several try-ons and realized how ratty and old they looked and that they were falling apart. I've held on to them this long because the boots these days all seem so ugly and odd shaped with pointy heels and pointy toes and thick and floppy. My boots were a throw-back to the days when the tall chunky heel rained supreme. I couldn't even wear them this last season, though. They are now frayed and the leather has cracked and the heel is coming off on one of the boots and also the zipper is a bit rusted so it was hard to slip on. They're just old.

I'm also finally trading in my desktop for a laptop. That thing is heavy so it's about time. It's a homemade variety (not by me) and has served me for over six years. But the off button no longer works and it's just to big to continue to lug around. The only problem is trying to figure out a way to get all my legally downloaded and purchased itunes music onto the new computer. I've basically resorted to burning a lot of CD's and then importing them, but the burned CD's have lost all the song info. I know there's got to be a better way than this, I just am not that techno-savy.

Anyway, I just wanted to post because I really haven't for a while and I don't want anyone here thinking I've thrown them or this blog away. I just haven't either had the internet or the time or felt a creative writing flow in a while. Maybe when my life settles back into a routine I'll be able to post here on a more regular basis. The thing about this blog though is that now there are some people who read my blog every once in a while from work, or from some place that involves my work (like someone I would possibly interview or interact with) and that poses all sorts of problems. Blogs are personal, especially mine. They're not exactly like reading my journal, but I've found them to be a good way to stay in touch with my friends and let them reply back so others can see and we can continue those discussions we used to have, or have had, late into the night. It's been more like a mass email system where we can keep in touch with one another. But blogs are also open to the public. I (perhaps naively) assumed no one but my friends cared to read my random musings, but they do. THis means no more talking about my dating life, work life, or pretty much my opinion on anything happening in my life of consequence here. And that's where all the fun writing comes in. I don't feel like I can do that on here anymore. I'll have to figure something out. I may start another blog and only let my friends know about it...but it'd be a shame to throw out this one.


Anonymous said…
Re the whole iTunes thing - Copy the songs to CDs but in your iTunes preferences, use the "mp3" or "data" option. Hope that works!
seth said…
why not make up a fictionalized version of your life. you cxould even have fictionalized events and characters, but you would have to tip off your real audience by using some sort of code word or phrase in those posts. Oh, and btw, the iTunes comment was me too I just forgot to use "other" instead of "anonymous."
abz said…
Seth is a completely fictional person. :P I know I haven't seen him in months so he must not exist. :)
SJ said…
I was surprised to see his post myself. I hear he goes to Virginia regularly, though. Only visiting your gf and not your REAL friends? Dude, what's up with that? Okay, so we all miss a little Sethness in our lives. Come to Utah!
Steve said…
I've also learned that you have to be careful with the blog, but I've also known that since day one.

There are only a couple rules I use and I don't find them too confining.
1) Don't ever talk about work or at least people at work.
2) I refer to people only by their first initial, that way they know who they are when they read it and/or only people in the know follow along. But it also creates an almost character too, since often times they become recurring. Referring to me as S, St. or Steve is really no difference and doesn't reveal too much extra info.
3) Don't write anything you don't want people to know. Sounds dumb, but if you don't want X to find out you think she is fat, dumb, unattractive, etc. then don't point it out.
I write about lots of stuff I do in my life and just do these three rules and have been lucky (knock on wood) so far.
abz said…
Well the girl is in Arizona and then she's moving to California now so I don't think he'll be back down South anytime soon. :) I need to send you an email since I finally got my tickets to Zion.
Esperanza said…
So, we need you to blog so that we can hear all about SLC and hte roomate issues...ect...I miss having you in provo already!
mj said…
remember how you called me and then i called you back and then you called me back and i called you back and then you called me back but we never actually talked? a shame isn't it?
SJ said…
Yes, I often think of those times as I sit here surfing the net, or watching tv, or doing something other than calling you...One of these days we will connect and it will be magical. Well, maybe not magical because magic isn't real, but well, a phone call isn't really the same thing as face to face either. One of these days I think I need to get to DC. Our show is about to start, though, so if I do get the chance to go anywhere it probably won't be until August.

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