Death and Taxes
As Benjamin Franklin said, "In this world nothing is certain but death and taxes".
Today is a good day. The sky was blue, now gray. There's a steady rain. But it's also 60 degrees out. It's February. I'll take what I can get. Hooner is temping with me today. She's on another floor. We were going to go to lunch to celebrate our employment, but she had to stuff evelopes. She's in the executive office. For some reason that intimidates me. I went to go shoot the breeze with her about an hour ago anyway. You know how sometimes you just do things to do them so you don't have to admit to yourself it doesn't really freak you out that much? Michelle was sitting peacefully at the front desk. Everyone else was at lunch, including the CEO, so it was much less intimidating. It bugs me that I'm intimidated. After all, the CEO's just a person. Just a person that runs the North American section of a big defense contractor company for the United States Government. No big deal. I met him once. I think we shook hands. Still, the thought.
If I were to interview him I wouldn't be afraid. He would need a good interview. We'd share a pouch of really good Godiva hot chocolate; with swizzle sticks. I'd provide the swizzle sticks and would not be swayed or influenced in any way by the good hot chocolate. Here they repeatedly tell me I am an assistant. "Assistant". I try to correct them, "I prefer file-folder princess, thanks", but they just shake their heads. Sometimes they laugh. They must think I'm kidding. Someday soon I'll have to put up a sign in front of my cubicle, "Magical Kingdom of the File-Folder Princess, Welcome Subjects", they would bow.
The boss is still out. He's in Orlando, about to catch a plan back to DC in ten minutes. I may have to call and reschedule for a later flight. We're crossing our fingers he makes it. Tomorrow I will have plenty of Expense Reports to fill out. Tomorrow I will have plenty of meetings to schedule and his calendar to keep track of. I may even need to get coffee, or an orange juice for a visitor. Or perhaps walk them to the bathroom (it's a security thing). Tomorrow there will be plenty to do. But today he is gone.
Today I am doing my taxes. My last job didn't pay all that much, and freelancing really didn't pay all that much, and NPR, not so much. Together that's a whole lot of not so much. I should be getting a diminutive refund one of these months, God bless America. A good refund if I put it together right.
Taxes also intimidate me. Not in the same way as the CEO. More like I know very little about them. I grabbed all three books: 1040, 1040 A, and the 1040 EZ. Picked them up at the local library last night. Nice little place, that library. I still don't have a card there. It's mostly kids books, but you can request books from other libraries and they ship them over for you. It's just a block from my house. Imagine that, free books. Thanks again, Franklin. I don't know where he comes up with this stuff. The quotes, the libraries, the glasses, France...
Anyway. I figure if I take all three books and fill out all three of the forms I will be able to determine which one is the best. I'll probably end up syphoning advice from distant acquaintances and people who don't really know much about individual taxes, but who know something about math and maybe do corporate taxes (which gives them a whole leap ahead on me). No, silly accountant man, I don't actually own a "magical kingdom". Someday, just so you are aware of my plans, I will be making "big bucks" as a famous writer and/or journalist. Tax that! Of course this is not what I'll say. I will be extra nice to the tax person who is suddenly my friend because they have all sorts of erudition for such things as money and laws and things I don't pay much attention to.
There are more constants than death and taxes. My constant is writing. No matter if at my day job I'm a princess-slash-assistant. I'm a writer. It's in my bones, it's in my blood, it's just in me. It's the only thing I've always known I could do-that and an uncanny ability to get incriminating information out of others (I have matured enough to keep such information highly confidential-thank you).
This blog, it's a bit of an op-ed, journal, and sometimes an open diatribe, but someday I'll be sustainably paid for my work. I'd like to say I'd smile at a tax on that, but I'll probably just procrastinate doing my taxes, and once again (yet another constant) hand it off to someone else to do it for me. C'est la vie!
Today is a good day. The sky was blue, now gray. There's a steady rain. But it's also 60 degrees out. It's February. I'll take what I can get. Hooner is temping with me today. She's on another floor. We were going to go to lunch to celebrate our employment, but she had to stuff evelopes. She's in the executive office. For some reason that intimidates me. I went to go shoot the breeze with her about an hour ago anyway. You know how sometimes you just do things to do them so you don't have to admit to yourself it doesn't really freak you out that much? Michelle was sitting peacefully at the front desk. Everyone else was at lunch, including the CEO, so it was much less intimidating. It bugs me that I'm intimidated. After all, the CEO's just a person. Just a person that runs the North American section of a big defense contractor company for the United States Government. No big deal. I met him once. I think we shook hands. Still, the thought.
If I were to interview him I wouldn't be afraid. He would need a good interview. We'd share a pouch of really good Godiva hot chocolate; with swizzle sticks. I'd provide the swizzle sticks and would not be swayed or influenced in any way by the good hot chocolate. Here they repeatedly tell me I am an assistant. "Assistant". I try to correct them, "I prefer file-folder princess, thanks", but they just shake their heads. Sometimes they laugh. They must think I'm kidding. Someday soon I'll have to put up a sign in front of my cubicle, "Magical Kingdom of the File-Folder Princess, Welcome Subjects", they would bow.
The boss is still out. He's in Orlando, about to catch a plan back to DC in ten minutes. I may have to call and reschedule for a later flight. We're crossing our fingers he makes it. Tomorrow I will have plenty of Expense Reports to fill out. Tomorrow I will have plenty of meetings to schedule and his calendar to keep track of. I may even need to get coffee, or an orange juice for a visitor. Or perhaps walk them to the bathroom (it's a security thing). Tomorrow there will be plenty to do. But today he is gone.
Today I am doing my taxes. My last job didn't pay all that much, and freelancing really didn't pay all that much, and NPR, not so much. Together that's a whole lot of not so much. I should be getting a diminutive refund one of these months, God bless America. A good refund if I put it together right.
Taxes also intimidate me. Not in the same way as the CEO. More like I know very little about them. I grabbed all three books: 1040, 1040 A, and the 1040 EZ. Picked them up at the local library last night. Nice little place, that library. I still don't have a card there. It's mostly kids books, but you can request books from other libraries and they ship them over for you. It's just a block from my house. Imagine that, free books. Thanks again, Franklin. I don't know where he comes up with this stuff. The quotes, the libraries, the glasses, France...
Anyway. I figure if I take all three books and fill out all three of the forms I will be able to determine which one is the best. I'll probably end up syphoning advice from distant acquaintances and people who don't really know much about individual taxes, but who know something about math and maybe do corporate taxes (which gives them a whole leap ahead on me). No, silly accountant man, I don't actually own a "magical kingdom". Someday, just so you are aware of my plans, I will be making "big bucks" as a famous writer and/or journalist. Tax that! Of course this is not what I'll say. I will be extra nice to the tax person who is suddenly my friend because they have all sorts of erudition for such things as money and laws and things I don't pay much attention to.
There are more constants than death and taxes. My constant is writing. No matter if at my day job I'm a princess-slash-assistant. I'm a writer. It's in my bones, it's in my blood, it's just in me. It's the only thing I've always known I could do-that and an uncanny ability to get incriminating information out of others (I have matured enough to keep such information highly confidential-thank you).
This blog, it's a bit of an op-ed, journal, and sometimes an open diatribe, but someday I'll be sustainably paid for my work. I'd like to say I'd smile at a tax on that, but I'll probably just procrastinate doing my taxes, and once again (yet another constant) hand it off to someone else to do it for me. C'est la vie!
Comments
Its odd to think what choices a child really has in todays world. Okay maybe wage slave isnt all that better then a real one, but lets look at the opptions, CEO,Drug Pusher, Mobster (in Russia "Baldies") Prostitute thats a huge one paid and unpaid, hmm what other marvelous professional choices are children really faced with, em, Soldier, wow that is a big one, maniac muslim, right wing connie (conservitive) Killer Christian (holy war type) what oher marvelous choices has man devised for profesional ideas?!..Mc Donalds, Dominos,Donald Chump employee, Back Braker Landscaper and Wharehouse Whore. That is just to name a few wonderful employment for the majority.
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